Wildlife Sighting!

I knew this would probably happen eventually…

I was walking into Trader Joe’s the other day, passed someone and immediately thought “I wonder where I know him from...”  I don’t even think I finished that whole thought in my head before I realized who he was… yes, it was our old friend the honey badger. *eye roll* Go back to the September – October timeframe if you don’t remember him.

I just walked past him and I don’t think he recognized me.  After I passed him, I did give a little snicker because I know that I’m happier now with Swing then I ever would have been with him.  

Everything (and everyone) happens for a reason, and he was definitely NOT my reason. 

And now, back to our regularly scheduled programming… ;) 

Long time no see :)

Yeah, yeah, yeah…

I totally know that I haven’t updated in, like FOREVER, but I have a darn good reason – the two main parts of my life (work life and personal life) have both been busy. I’ll skip right over the work life portion to get to what you’re all dying to know about – my personal life.  Specifically, my personal life with Swing. *girlish grin*  Having a wonderful time with someone I love is great for me, but doesn’t provide much blog fodder and doesn’t really leave me with a ton of extra time to share said fodder with all of you, but I am not complaining AT ALL! 

Now a lot has happened over the past few months (besides adding to the ol’ shoe collection as you can see).  Honestly, I’ve thought about updating the blog a number of times, I just never actually had the time to do it. I even thought of cute titles that I was going to use and everything… so here is a condensed version of two months worth of updates. :)

Keys to the Kingdom

Swing officially moved into “the Inn” at the end of February.  As in any case with selling a house, there was a little last minute drama, but after a few days’ delay, the pending sale was back on and everything was finalized in the beginning of March. 

Once he moved in, he promptly had a key made for me (BTW, I had given him a key to my place a few weeks before).  It’s nice that we can easily meet at either place or even just hang out if we want to while we wait for the other to get home.   Plus, since I can work from anywhere, I’ve started to work from down there a few days a week so we can spend more time together.

We’re now in the process of getting everything all fixed up at the Inn.  We did little updates here and there, but really made a dent last weekend with not one, but two trips to IKEA.  I could make a joke and say that we picked up everything but the kitchen sink, but we actually did buy a kitchen sink (LOL).  Swing is a pretty handy guy and he’s taking care of all the plumbing with the sink so we’ll actually be able to cook and have a regular meal down there that doesn’t involve paper plates!

Oh, where did I leave my heart?

In the beginning of March, I also had to head to San Francisco for a week for work.  Since Swing had never been there, it was a perfect opportunity to stay the weekend and play tourists for a few days. 

He arrived on Thursday night and did stop by my office on Friday to meet some of my co-workers (and yes, they approve LOL). After I got done working, we enjoyed the rest of the weekend and spent a wonderful two days touring the area.  We spent Saturday in the city (Ferry Building, Coit Tower, Cable Cars, etc.) It was great, especially since I had never been to Coit Tower – I got to see something new too.  We even rounded out the day at a place that I’ve missed since I left California – In and Out Burger!

On Sunday, it was time to head up to wine country.  We headed to my favorite winery (V. Sattui in St. Helena) and enjoyed the afternoon there.  We tasted some great wine (and yes, took a few… OK, 7… bottles home with us).  We joined the wine club since we really like their wine and I’m happy to say that we got our first monthly shipment earlier today (a Zinfandel and a Syrah).  After our tasting, we had a bite to eat on the winery grounds, then headed up the road to see what else we could find.  We did stop dead in our tracks when we saw a sign that said “Crazy Good Cabernets” (how can you pass that up?) and did one more tasting (and yes, they were crazy good… but at about $50 a bottle, they better be).  We didn’t buy any more wine, but had a wonderful time.  This time, we rounded out our day with an amazing Chicago style pizza at Zachary’s in Oakland (I swear, this pizza is like 2” thick!)

We took a ton of pictures, including one of the bathroom towel that the maids folded like a monkey (really!)  Once we got home, we bought some frames and each made a fun collage of photos to help capture the trip for each of us.  I think that will turn into a fun ritual after each trip…

Here bunny, bunny, bunny

Easter was a very long day… I had church with my mom (so early that even the Priest asked if everyone was awake), then dinner at 1:00 at my parent’s (also known as lunch), and then dinner later on with Swing’s family. 

My mom has a fun tradition of hiding my Easter Basket, complete with “you’re getting warmer” tips to help me find it.  I surprised her by making her a basket too and slyly hid it as I walked in.  It was fun and I’m still eating jelly beans and peeps.

We brought some wine and beer to my parent’s… we brought Dos Equis and we joked about who would have a worse pronunciation of that name between my mom and dad – mom won with something like “Dose Eck-quise” (but she really enjoyed the beer!)  We also brought cake pops, which everyone loved.

Dinner (at a normal time) was a bit more relaxed with his family.  We brought cake pops there too and made a great Easter Basket for his niece.  It was so much fun picking out everything and then building the basket together.  The only downer is that the poor child isn’t really allowed to have sweets (um, so peeps were definitely out), so we did fun things like bubbles and a bit lollipop-shaped soap. 

But the best part of Easter was actually the night before… we were relaxing down at the Inn and Swing gave me a card.  Inside said something about the “Crazy Good” times that were ahead of us… Yes, he found a place to buy a bottle of that “Crazy Good Cabernet” that we tasted in wine country!  We’re going to save that for a really special occasion when only something “Crazy Good” will do.  ;)

OK, I guess I’ll wrap up there.   You’re officially up to speed with what’s going on with Swing and I and I’m ready to call it a night.  I promise I won’t stay away so long next time – I’m sure I’ll have more “Crazy Good” times to tell you about!

Love is in the air…

Swing and I had our first Valentine’s Day together and it was wonderful.  He sent me beautiful red, white and pink roses (they came with a cute little teddy bear) and got me I LUV U peeps and Valentine’s M&Ms (boy, does he know the way to my heart!)  I made a nice dinner for Valentine’s Day… complete with candles, sparkling wine and a little chocolate heart shaped cake for dessert.  If you’re curious, I got him a book by his favorite author that he was able to get signed last weekend and I got him a new digital camera. 

Now, I’ve been in love before, but it’s never been like this.  I’m very much in love with him, but the difference for me is what I feel in return.  I feel so loved by him, and it’s wonderful. :)  We kiss all the time (and yes, we’re still keeping our tradition of kissing at red lights).  We hold hands… we walk with our arms around each other… we stop and kiss for absolutely no reason…  We’ve become that couple – you know, the ones that are so hopelessly in love with each other and so stinkin’ cute together.  Yep, that’s us!  I’ve always wanted to be part of that couple, but never was, until now.  It’s such a great feeling and one that was a long time coming (for both of us).

Speaking of love, a sweet Valentine’s tradition that I love are those wonderful little chalk-like candy hearts.  Anyone who is addicted to them like I am knows that they’ve changed over the past few years and just don’t taste the same (boo).  The sayings have changed too – you know, to keep up with the times.

You have your old favorites like XOXO, LOVE ME, SOUL MATE, CUTIE PIE, PUPPY LOVE, MY LOVE and FOR EVER.

Now there are some new ones like TWEET ME, EMAIL ME, TEXT ME and YOU ROCK.  FRIEND ME and PIN IT can’t be far behind…

There are some that are a bit questionable:  LOVE HIM (am I giving this candy heart on behalf of someone else?), GAME ON (ohhh, a challenge), U CAN DO IT (for a little inspiration), LET’S RIDE (um... OK), GO GO GO (away?), SHAKE IT (aren’t these targeted to children?) and JUMP 4 ME (which, if printed crooked, just looks like JUMP ME). 

Then of course, there are the lovely little hearts pictured to the right (OK, I couldn't get the picture to load correctly into blog, so I had to improvise...)

As you can see, quality control is a little lax at the old candy heart factory.  The one on the left kind of looks like it says "BONO" (for all those U2 fans).  My favorite is the one on the right that says CK ME.  I guess you can insert whatever word you can think of that ends in CK to fill in the blank…

Swing has less than two weeks before closing on his house (and bidding the ex goodbye).  He’ll be moving to “the inn,” which is, actually, a real inn right near the beach.  His family owns it and is in the process of renovating it, so he’s moving in to the main part, which is a 2 bedroom, 2 bath condo with a beautiful sunroom that overlooks the water.  Since that’s “the inn,” we’ve nicknamed my house as “the pool house.”  It will be nice to get him settled in so I can start spending more time with him.  He spends the weekends with me and now, I’ll be able to stay a few days at a time with him (since I work remotely, all I need is wireless and a place to set up my computer).  We’re both really looking forward to being able to spend more time together.

Speaking of time together, we’ve officially booked our first vacation together.  I’m going to SF in a few weeks for work, so I extended my trip through the weekend and Swing will be flying out to join me.  He’ll get there late on Thursday night – I work on Friday, so he can sleep in and relax.  He’ll join me at my office for lunch so he can meet some of the people I work with, then we’ll pick up our rental car and get settled in our new hotel for the weekend.  It will be nice – we have all day Saturday and Sunday to do some sightseeing, then we’ll leave on Monday to head home.  It’s a perfect weekend getaway that will involve Cable Cars, beautiful sights and wine tasting – oh, and kisses… lots of kisses. ;)

An unexpected twist

So a few days after Swing met my parents, I got to meet his family…

His whole family…

At the hospital, after his father passed away unexpectedly.

It definitely wasn’t the most ideal way to meet his family, but they were all so very sweet and everyone mentioned how happy they were that he had me to take care of him.  They also said how nice it was to have him “back” since he had been so unhappy for so long – I guess I brought his smile back.  I overheard him telling several relatives how happy he was that we found each other and that he has a whole new life now.

The memorial service was yesterday.  I knew that would be hard – and it was.  It was hard seeing someone I love be so sad.  But it was also hard because I’m a crier (a big blubber would probably be a more accurate description).  If I see someone crying, I cry.  If I hear emotion in someone’s voice or hear them choke up on their words, I cry.  Even when I see really strong emotion (even when it’s happy), I cry.  Yes, I even cry when they crown a Miss America because of all the emotion that you see – yep, I’m just a big blubber.  The funny thing about me is that I know that I shouldn’t be crying at things, which can sometimes make me laugh.  So imagine me crying and laughing at the same time – boy I’m a mess, huh? 

So, being a big crying/laughing blubber, the simple act of attending a memorial service is not easy for me.  I took LOTS of tissues because I knew I would need them.  Plus, I did give Swing the head’s up that I would cry because that’s just what I do.  At one point towards the end, I started to cry (again) and he looked at me to ask if I was OK.  I started to laugh a bit because I knew how silly it was for me to be crying (again) and he started laughing too.  He said that I could always make him laugh… It was a very sweet moment.

We spent the whole day after the service (which was beautiful, by the way) with the family.  I fit right in so it felt really good that I was there.  We’re heading down today again for a while to visit with relatives who had come in from their hometown, so it will be a more casual get together.

This whole experience has really brought us closer in a very, very good way.  I know it was a hard way to start out 2012, but I look forward to the happy times that the rest of this year will bring. :)

Meeting the ‘rents

Since Swing and I had been going strong for over a month now, I knew eventually I would have to take that big step and introduce him to my parents.  I wasn’t sure how or when I would do it, but it was getting to the point where it felt like the appropriate time to do it.  Then, the other day, my mom called me to tell that the city’s annual art festival was happening on Saturday and she wanted to know if I wanted to meet them there.  This was perfect – a nice casual way for them to meet Swing.  We would all meet at the farmer’s market and then walk over to the art show.

It was a bit of a chilly morning… according to the Weather Channel app, it said mid-60’s, so I grabbed a denim jacket and off we went to grab some breakfast before the art show.  We ate, and by the time we walked out of the restaurant, I swear it was like 20 degrees colder than it was when we walked in. I was beginning to doubt my choice of a denim jacket (mind you, I have several San Francisco-appropriate jackets and sweaters, but I didn’t choose any of those). We got to the farmer’s market and I texted my mom to see where they were.  I was standing there shivering in my denim jacket so Swing took off his jacket to give to me and he went back to the car to get himself a sweatshirt that he had in there (awww, he’s so sweet).

Now, yes, I was shivering in my denim jacket because it was a pretty lightweight material.  I would guess it was in the mid 50-s with a breeze, so it was a chilly day.  I found my parents while Swing was getting his sweatshirt, and by the way they were dressed, you would have thought it was snowing outside!  Now, I do tease them because they’re always cold, and in their defense, they were warm and I was the one who originally wasn’t dressed appropriately… but they were decked out head to toe in jackets, scarves and gloves.  All bundled up and ready to face the cold, arctic weather here in sunny Florida. LOL

Swing met back up with us, I introduced him, and we started to make our way to the art festival.  We quickly found a nice bench to park my dad on – he would rather sit and relax than try to keep up with my mom who goes a mile a minute.  With dad comfortably parked, off we went to see what the local artists had to offer.  My first stop was a place that sold cute little woven bracelets.  I wanted an ankle bracelet since I’ll be spending more time walking barefoot on the beach with Swing… :)

We caught up with my mom (who was half way through the art show by that time) and then eventually made our way back to pick up my dad.  It was time for lunch… now they had all sorts of food vendors with just about every type of food “on a stick” that you could want, but they wanted to go to a regular restaurant.  We walked up the street and found a little café – mind you, Swing and I weren’t hungry after our big breakfast, but we split a nice crepe while my parents had a nice lunch. 

All in all, it was a nice time.  The only awkward thing was that my mom kept wanting to call him by a different name *eye roll* but at least it wasn’t my ex’s name…

Speaking of ex’s… Swing had a few run ins with his ex over the weekend about some issues with the house that they’re trying to sell.  From what I can tell, she’s controlling, needy, can’t do anything for herself and doesn’t want to take responsibility for anything – OMG, she’s the female version of my own ex (you know, good ol’ DBE)!  It’s no wonder that Swing and I get along so well – we’ve had such similar experiences of what we had to deal with, we can totally relate to one another!

I’ll end this blog update with the two most fun words ever:  CAKE POPS!  A good friend of Swing’s was having a little get-together for his birthday and we were trying to figure out what to bring.  I had been looking for an excuse to dabble in the world of cake pops so this was the perfect time to start.  I got a pan, some cake mix, chocolate and lollipop sticks, and we were ready to go!  They’re not hard to make, but there is some trial and error involved... Take the first completed cake pop for example – I put the stick in, dipped it in the chocolate to coat it, put some sprinkles on it and then stuck the stick into the styrofoam block to let it dry… or at least that’s what I thought.  Once I put the pop into the styrofoam, the little cake ball decided to drop down the stick, much like the ball drop on New Year’s Eve.  Slowly down to the bottom, then plop, right onto the stryofoam. *eye roll* I think I was laughing so hard I was almost crying. I’m happy to report that the rest of the batch turned out fine and they were the hit of the party!

Mmmmm, gotta love a good cake pop.  And in what we learned from the art show, everything (especially cake, chocolate and a few sprinkles) is better on a stick!

The Drunk Monkeys

New Year’s has come and gone and now it’s time to start a brand new year.  I have high hopes for 2012 – filled with good times with family, friends and one very special guy.  :)  This year started out the right way, with good drinks, good food, good music, good people watching (OMG), and, oh yes, a reeeeaaaaallllly good kiss at midnight.  Here are the details…

Good drinks – After wandering around the downtown area for a while, we made our way to a nice, somewhat upscale restaurant and managed to find two seats at the bar.  We enjoyed a nice drink and had the bartender take our first official “couple” picture. BTW, we really do look good together. :)

Good food – After enjoying our drinks, we asked for a menu.  They had the normal, limited, fancy-dancy New Year’s menu (complete with jacked-up prices that just about made me fall off my barstool).  We finished our drinks and headed back outside to scope out other options. We passed a little walk-up Mexican restaurant that had bottles of Tapatio on the tables – for anyone who knows me, you know that’s my favorite hot sauce, so naturally, we stopped there.  We enjoyed tacos, guacamole and chips, Tapatio and good company!  Nice and spicy!

Good music – Our mission was to find one of the bands that was advertised to play: The Drunk Monkeys.  Now, we had no idea of who they were or what kind of music they played, but with a name like The Drunk Monkeys, we knew we needed to find out.  We wondered from stage to stage and saw a pretty good Beatles cover band, a very out of tune country band and some random white guy trying to pull off a Cee Lo song (Forget You FAIL).  Finally, we saw a band setting up – The Drunk Monkeys!  I have to say that they were actually one of the better bands that was performing and they played a good selection of music. 

Good people watching – Mullets, hooker shoes, and really (really) bad fashion – oh my!  But the best show was watching the people dance to The Drunk Monkeys (um, the really drunk people dancing to The Drunk Monkeys). These people thought they were so cool… newsflash, when you’re really drunk, you don’t dance as well as you think you do.  But it was funny to see both young and old making complete and utter fools of themselves while the rest of us just stood by and laughed.

Good kiss at midnight – Well, we actually started the midnight kiss well before midnight (gotta warm up, right?) We stopped to watch the ball drop… OK, it was just a cheesy version of a ball drop from a fire truck ladder, but I give ‘em credit for trying.  Oh, and the fireworks were a fairly lame display set off from a parking lot next to the fire truck ladder, but at least they were fireworks (he he).  We continued that midnight kiss well after midnight too (why stop when you’re having fun), and then we heard the funniest line of the night.  Some girl passing us by was yelling into her phone “THAT SUCKED!  I’M NEVER COMING BACK TO THIS CITY AGAIN FOR NEW YEAR’S EVE!”  OK, seriously, what did she really expect??  This ain’t Times Square honey…

So, since then, Swing and I have been spending a lot of time together.  We’ve spent time walking on the beach, enjoying lazy mornings together and having nice romantic dinners.  We do all those cute things that new couples do… we hold hands and kiss all the time – we even have a fun ritual of kissing when we’re stopped at red lights.  We just can’t help it (LOL)… I always wanted to have a relationship where other people would look at us and say “I wish we could be that happy.” Now I’ve got it!  I’ve waited a really long time to be this happy with someone and it feels great.

So, back to enjoying nice romantic dinners… I do a lot of cooking and it turns out that I am actually a pretty good cook (who knew??)  I asked my mom for a Tagine for Christmas because I thought it was cool (if you don’t know, that’s a Moroccan cooking thingy that looks like it has an up-side-down funnel on the top).  I’ve made pork with peppers in it and am going to try a recipe for chicken with chickpeas and mint this weekend.  I’ve been making good use of my Epicurious app on my iPad! 

But I’ve also discovered a fun new thing (OK, not really so new).  I had Groupon when I was back in San Francisco, but when you get deals that are meant for two and you’re just one, it’s not much fun.  I signed up here and we actually used our first Groupon at a nice Italian restaurant last night.  The food was great and the group of people next to us was quite entertaining.  This area has its share of retired people, so we got to listen to an awesome conversation about someone who had a double hernia and now wants to ride a motorcycle again.  It’s a good thing we had drinks! *eye roll*  The next Groupon is for a restaurant on the beach – two breakfast entrees and two mimosas for $17 (sign me up!)  We’re going to try that one this weekend…

And in true fashion, I did add two more pairs of shoes to my collection.  Swing is tall (6’2”) and I’m not, so heels make it so much easier to kiss him.  He’s only seen the tip of the ice burg when it comes to my shoes and so far, so good.  Oh, which new pair will I share with him first… decisions, decisions. ;) 

In Full Swing

It’s been 17 days since the first “wink” and 10 days since our first date (you know, that 4 hour date), and Swing and I are still going strong. :)  We’re at that fun, beginning stage of the relationship where we spend time with idle chit chat as we get to know each other… oh, and we make out for hours on end! 

We spent a nice time together on the Friday before Christmas, then both had family time on Christmas Eve and Christmas Day.  We got some time to ourselves and spent wonderful day together the Monday after Christmas.  We spent time in the Downtown area of the city – having lunch and walking along the water.  Then we headed off to the beach where we had a beautiful drive and then scouted (with no luck) to find a place to park so we could walk on the beach.  After waiting in lines of cars waiting for someone to leave a public parking spot (and doing a little making out while we waited), we gave up and started to head back. We stopped for some ice cream and listened to a guy playing a guitar… just a nice, relaxing, sunny, warm Florida day! 

We did finally get a little “beach time” in on the way back… I pulled into what I thought was a spot, but it was a no parking zone, so we just say for a while by the rocks and listened to the waves as I watched to make sure Florida’s finest didn’t try to generate a little extra revenue for the state by giving me a ticket.  LOL  Hey, at least I got to enjoy the beach even though I didn’t actually get my feet wet.

We wrapped up the evening by making a nice dinner – I must say that my cooking skills are really looking pretty impressive, if I do say so myself.  I have always thought of myself as an OK cook, but I’ve made three awesome dinners that turned out pretty good (I guess all that making out is doing some good!)  We’ve got plans for New Year’s Eve, so we’ll be ready to officially start off the new year right!  2012 is looking pretty good to me and I can’t wait to see what happens next…

In other news, a good friend of mine sent me a link to her website for jewelry – check it out and show her some love!

http://valeriesoule.chloeandisabel.com/

I’ve been on it a few times and have already seen a couple of necklaces that have caught my eye!  Now that I’m going out more, I need to make sure the accessories collection is just as complete as the shoe collection!  A girl’s gotta look good, right? 

And speaking of going out more (LOL), I did check out some local dance studios to see about lessons.  You’ll remember that Swing got his name because he did enjoy taking dance lessons in the past (enjoyed the lessons, yes; enjoyed the partner at the time, no).  So I found a place that looked cool and bought a four class pass that we can share – so two classes that we attend together.  I figured that it would be a good way to ease into it and see if we like the place.  It turns out that it was the same place that he used to go to (slightly awkward), but now with his new partner (me!), hopefully it will be a much better experience.  Now I just have to find a pair of heels that not only look good, but that I can dance in too! 

I hope all of you have a wonderful, happy and safe New Year’s… here’s to an amazing 2012! :)

Filling up my social calendar

Whew!  What a weekend!

I had not one… not two… but three dates this past weekend.  In a nutshell it was three dates, two guys and one good connection.

Everything started earlier in the week.  Crocs and I had coffee one morning and tentatively made plans for a date on Friday night.  During that time, I also started talking via email to another guy – I’ll call him Swing (this will be explained later) who seemed like a really nice guy.  Friday ended up being a busy day for me – I had a phone date scheduled for 6:00 to get to know Swing and a date at 8:00 with Crocs.  Boy, I’m big pimpin’ now, aren’t I? ROFL!

So the date with Crocs was nice.  We went to a pretty casual restaurant where I had an oyster for the first time (and surprisingly, it wasn’t as totally gross as I thought it would be).  We chatted over wings and sangria and then tried to figure out what to do next.  He asked if I would be up for going to listen to some live music somewhere and the young (most likely underage) girl in the next booth over spun around and told us to go to “The Big Buddha” since that’s where everyone goes – apparently this is where they were all going too.  So off to The Big Buddha…

We walked in, then walked out…

So, yes, they had a great band playing – that wasn’t the issue.  The issue was that they were playing so loud that Crocs and I couldn’t even hear each other when we asked “do you think it’s too loud in here?” If we just wanted to chill out and listen to the music, the place would have been great.  But we actually wanted to, oh, you know, speak to each other.  So off we went in search of another option.

We did find another place that had a band, but they also had an outside patio where we could enjoy the music and actually carry on a conversation – of course, we were out there with every chain smoker in the place, but we managed to find a table off to the side that wasn’t in the direct line for the cloud of second-hand smoke.  We had a beer and talked for about another hour.  I did find out that he actually isn’t divorced yet… they’re trying to figure out all the logistics and timing for that.  I was already a little concerned that he might have had a bit too much baggage for me, and this just added an extra piece.  I’d kept it at a fairly casual relationship all along, which I’m glad I did. 

So on to the rest of my weekend…

During my phone date with Swing, I found out that we’re both looking for someone that we can enjoy being with and do fun things together.  He’s taken dance lessons in the past, but his ex was overly critical of everything he did, so the only part of the dance lessons he liked was when he got to dance with other people.  He enjoyed the swing dancing classing (hence the name Swing) and he said that it’s something he would like to do with someone that would just enjoy the fun of it.  Admittedly, he’s not very good at it, but I probably wouldn’t be either – but I bet we’d have a blast just doing it and trying not to step on each other’s toes.

Anyway, so we spent about an hour and a half on the phone and then made plans for a date on Saturday night.  We met at a Mexican restaurant that he’d heard about but had never been to (plus, he gets extra points for mentioning that he saw that I liked Mexican on my online profile).  We spent four hours (yes, four hours) at the restaurant just talking.  We definitely hit it off very well! ;)  We both talked about what had been lacking in past relationships and what we want in a new relationship.  We both want to be happy, we both want someone who is down to earth, and we both want someone that we can laugh, smile and just have fun with.  The Saturday night date went so well that we ended up having another date on Sunday night. 

As for the shoes, I did dress up a bit on Saturday night with a cute top, cargo capris and the brown military inspired heels in the third picture down.  Those are pretty powerful shoes so I knew I must wield that power carefully.  I would say they worked well based on the four hour date… Date #2 on Sunday got the black suede wedge heels with the little ankle strap (formerly known as the “stand in secret weapons”).  I am happy to report that he does enjoy the sexy shoes and he’s looking forward to seeing more of my collection…

So , what’s he like?  He’s 47, he’s tall and thin with blonde-ish hair.  He manages a warehouse for a chemical company and has a side business doing home inspections.  He doesn’t have kids (he had a step son with the ex, but he’s 23).  So we’ve now officially gone from Crocs, who had a lot of baggage, to Swing who has very little baggage.  The last tie Swing has to his ex is the house that they’re in the process of selling.  Once that’s done, all ties will be cut.

Next weekend is Christmas, so both of us will be spending time with family (his parents and brothers are all local). We both have the day after Christmas off, so we've made plans to spend that day together.  We may go to the beach, where we can just relax and maybe catch a nice sunset. 

Now it’s time to enjoy the holiday season… My parents are so happy that I’m here with them, plus now, I have someone to kiss on New Year’s Eve.  What could be better???

What a Croc!

Well, it finally happened.  After several months of hopeful blogging, I finally had something I’d been waiting for… A real, normal, nice first date!  Honestly, I was beginning to wonder if those even existed anymore with the string of bad luck that I’ve been having with online dating.

I know the question that you’re all DYING to ask is “which shoes did I choose?”  Wait, what’s that?  You mean you want to know about the guy first? LOL Oh, OK, fine…

So after my run in with the scam artist, I did get back online.  After all, you can’t be afraid to get back up on the bike after you fall, right?  At least I didn’t part with any money when I fell… *eye roll*  I was still active with Match for a little longer, so I decided to check things out (of course, after I reported the scam artist).  I sent a few winks out and got a nice response back from a divorced guy who is also fairly new to the area.  We ended up chatting on the phone for a while over the weekend and made plans to have a nice lunch date on Monday.  Lunch feels safe – it’s not as “date-y” as dinner, so there’s not as much pressure.  We picked a nice restaurant on the water, which ended up being closed so we had to quickly regroup and blindly choose another restaurant.  We headed to the outdoor seating and had a nice lunch right on the water.  The food was good… the conversation was good… a perfect example of what one expects from a first date.

Let me tell you more about the guy… He’s from Rhode Island and just recently moved down to this area.  He stayed up north for a while his now ex-wife and kids were down here.  Turns out the now ex-wife decided to begin dating other people… um, while they were still married (ouch!)  He tried to work things out with her to keep the family together, but apparently, she started “dating” again (double ouch and hence, the reason for her becoming the “ex” wife).   He is a little older than me – 8 yrs to be exact, which isn’t too bad.  He’s got two younger kids at home (6 and 11) as well as grown kids from a previous marriage…  So yes, he has baggage (remember that 9-piece matching paisley luggage set from Macy’s that I mentioned when I began this blog), but he is a really nice guy, we have a good amount in common and I did have a very nice time with him at lunch.  For that, he wins the coveted prize of a second date. :)  Since we had lunch, now we’ll graduate to dinner, where I will really break out the shoes.

Speaking of shoes, I did choose a “lunch appropriate” pair (the Sam Edelman mid-heel sandals in the pictures). I checked the weather and it was supposed to be mild, but nice.  I thought I’d look all cute in jeans, a tank and a sweater… then I sat outside.  In partial sun.  For and hour and a half.  Sweating. Ugh!  So much for my cuteness, right?  I didn’t realize that (1) it was so hot because I was in my air-conditioned house all morning, and (2) that we would be eating outside until we made the final plans and I didn’t feel like changing. It’s all good… At least my shoes looked great, right?  And, in the grand scheme of things, I was having such a nice time that I really didn’t notice. ;)

Speaking of shoes (again), we did manage to turn our conversation to shoes.  LOL!  He mentioned that his ex started wearing Crocs and looked ridiculous (actually, he said she looked like a lesbian, but I’m trying to keep this blog PC). I assured him that I would NEVER (ever, ever) wear those (ever).  But then, he admitted to me that he wears them around the house too, and he even (gasp!) managed to get all the way to Home Depot before realizing that he still had them on.  So in wondering what I can call him on my blog, naturally, he will now be known as “Crocs.”

I have set the ground rules that he can’t wear the Crocs on a date because they will cancel out the sexiness of my shoes… If we make it to date #3, I may find a way to make his Crocs “mysteriously disappear” (or at least make sure they are permanently banished to the house).  LOL - I'm kidding about this... He's a nice guy, so I guess I can handle a pair (or two) of Crocs.  Besides, it may provide some good blog fodder... ;)

I do have to tell you about one other funny online dating thing that just happened to me today.  I got an email from another match.  Honestly, he was way too old for me, but he did send a clever email, so it at least warranted a response.  I gave him a nice TBNT message (“Thanks but no thanks” for all of you who have never worked in retail), and then got this response back:

Hello Debbie,

Thanks for replying to my “hello” email.

I wanted to share a thought that if you come across an interesting and attractive single female who is bright, charming, smart and more than a little bit interesting, I hope you might consider passing along my contact information.  I can be a wonderful extra male guest at a dinner party – I scrub up reasonably well, my verb tenses match up and I am comfortably secure.

Regards,

Chuck

Well, there you have it… he would like my help in hooking him up.  Um, you know, I’m kinda busy trying to find someone for myself let along trying to find someone for a perfect stranger.  

But thankfully, his verb tenses match up…

Nuts and bolts…

So, I’m sure you’re all wondering how I fell for this guy!  Being sweet and romantic does go a long way… here were some of the things that he said to me:

Sensuality is important to me some of my favorite things are the salty taste of lobster simmering in a beurre blanc sauce, the smell of the ocean mixed with suntan lotion on a summer day, the cool, velvety softness of well-worn cotton sheets on a hot summer night, the gentle touch of a lover, the beauty of a home which has been designed to be inviting and welcoming, the sound of leaves rustling beneath your feet in the Fall.

When in a relationship, I am quite content to be at home working on a project or help with cooking dinner or relaxing with my partner. My lifestyle is usually relaxed and pretty quiet. I'm more of an introvert than an extrovert,  however, I can hold my own at any social function.

If you ever feel lost.... just follow the path of your heart, and at the end of the path you will find me waiting for you with open arms.

You are a blessing that my entire being is very thankful for.

Romantic, yes… load of crap, yes…

The whole lie was fairly complex… his “mom” came to the states to visit and then stayed to watch his son when he got a contract that he had to leave for on short notice last week.  For as complex as his story was, the story that he created when he asked for money was pretty pathetic… here’s the abbreviated version:

He got an invitation to interview for a contract in England – he went there and won the contract that would be for two weeks.  He was given part of the money for the contract work up front from the company (Morrison’s Petrol Station) so he was able to hire laborers and get supplies to replace old pipes on an oil rig.  He got all the supplies he needed… there were long 40’ sections of pipe and special nuts and bolts to put everything together.  He got everything he needed, but was short one nut and bolt. These were special nuts and bolts that cost $1000 and that’s where he needed my help, since he was short one nut and bolt and was now out of money. Blah, blah, blah.

$1000 for a nut and bolt?  Really?? Even though I had fallen for this guy, that story just sounded utterly ridiculous!

So there you have it… this fake romance went from the smell of the ocean mixed with suntan lotion to a $1000 nut and bolt.  And I’m back to square one… again!  OK, seriously, all I want is to go on some first dates so I can wear my awesome shoes – is that really asking for too much?

Things aren’t always what they seem (again!)

Oh boy… So I was enjoying getting to know Mr. Cheers and honestly, I was really falling for the guy.  He was sweet, lovable, romantic… and oh yeah, he was also a complete scammer who asked me to wire him money this evening.

Um, no.

I started to research dating scams online and low and behold, I found a whole section of romancescam.com devoted to this guy (or at least to the pictures he was using).  Most women heard a very similar story to what I heard… widower… had a young son… did contract work for an oil company… Unfortunately, most ended up sending this guy money – I, fortunately, did not.  I sent him a reply to his last email that said this:

I found a very interesting website…

http://www.romancescam.com/forum/viewtopic.php?f=3&t=30905

Seems that you really get around. 

(and yes, I have several of those same pictures that he sent to me)

Ugh!  I’m 0 for 2 in this dating thing… I got a guy who flaked out on the first date and a guy who professed his undying love for me, but needed me to help him purchase some supplies to complete the oil contract that he was working on (to the tune of $1000…)  Yes, I fell for this guy but no, I’m not a complete idiot.

At least I have a new website to check with for the next guy I date… LOL 

This whole dating thing isn’t working out exactly how I planned… 

A leap of faith…

I know I haven’t updated in a while, so I figured I would let you all know why.

First, everything is still going well with the guy I mentioned in the last post (Mr. Cheers).  He will go down as the most polite, romantic and sweet guy I’ve ever known.  We’re enjoying getting to know one another, but for the first time since starting this blog, I kind of want to be a little more private about this one.  I think it’s because he is so polite and sweet – it doesn’t feel right to broadcast all the nitty gritty details all over cyberspace (LOL).

I will tell you a little about him because I’m sure you’re dying to know… He is 45 (just a few years older than I am, which is perfect) and he has a 4-yr old son.  He’s a widower who was married for 6 years and has been on his own for about 4 years now.  He was raised by his mom in South Africa and has traveled around quite a bit – partly for his job… partly because he loves to travel.  From what he tells me, he’s had some pretty awesome experiences in his life.

He’s completely unlike anyone I’ve ever dated before – which, come to think about it, is a good thing.  I’ve had my share of non-committal, non-working, non-affectionate and non-truthful guys (some of which, pretty recently), so the idea of having someone who’s a little old fashioned when it comes to relationships sounds kind of nice.  Hence, why I’m feeling a little old fashioned about this relationship too (aka no broadcasting).

Anyway, I’m going to leave it at that.  I will keep you posted if I have, in fact, found my “sole mate.” If not, I’ll be back in full swing… If yes, then I’ll probably start a new blog because this is fun!  Oh, and by the way, I did just get a delivery of some shoes today that I ordered online… 1 pair of ballet flats and 1 pair of mid-heel sandals.  I guess all this talk about being a bit old fashioned has tamed me down a bit – that, or I just figured I’ve got enough great heels to keep me (and Mr. Cheers) busy for a while. ;)

Good news!

A few of the guys I mentioned in my last post have apparently dropped off the face of the earth *eye roll*.  The others got a nice polite turn down email from me.  Why? Because (wait for it…) I am starting to move forward with a new guy!

Yes, I did learn a thing or two from the last relationship that I moved forward with – mainly, not to trust someone who starts to get wishy-washy on his feelings as soon as he meets me.  So I go into this new potential relationship with open eyes, a hopeful heart and some great first-date shoes to choose from.

I met this new guy on Meatmarket.com, I mean Match.com. Somehow, he found me in that sea of crazy screen names.  He liked my smile so he wrote me a nice email.  We’ve chatted back and forth and shared the basics of what we’re all about and what we’re looking for.  He seems sweet and romantic – it’s refreshing.  He said some things in his emails to me that just made my little heart melt! ;)  And he says Cheers at the end of his emails, which I think is cute.

So there you have it… a quick update with good news.  Cheers! ;)

So. Many. Choices.

My eHarmony subscription will be ending pretty soon, so I wondered what to do?  Should I renew? Should I try another website? Should I get a new pair of shoes to make me feel better?

The answers are (in order) Maybe… Yes… Not yet, but that’s always an option…

eHarmony has apparently ran out of the selection of eligible men in my local area so I continue to get matches from all over the state.  This isn’t a bad thing, but I was wondering if Match.com would at least give me more of a shot with someone not several hours away.  I logged on, created a profile, and because they offered a 1-month membership for $31, I figured that it was worth it to at least see what it’s all about.

The two sites couldn’t be any more different.  Here are some words that I would use to describe them:

eHarmony: Polite, Reserved, Slow and Steady, Exclusive

Match: Free for all, Meat market, Overwhelming

Now, Match does have a few features that I with eHarmony had.  They have a “No Thanks” option for winks and emails which gives you a polite way to turn someone down.  There isn’t that option in eHarmony, so you have to either send an email saying no or just ignore them. Match also has an IM system so you can instantly talk to someone if you’re both online (this is good, but can easily get very overwhelming).

eHarmony also uses first names – it makes it a bit more personal because you know who you’re talking to.  Match makes you create a user name.  Since all the variations of my first name were taken (really?), I was forced to come up with something creative.  Anyone who knows me knows that I am an animation art fan and my favorite character is Pepe le Pew.  The cat he chases is Penelope, so my screen name became Penelope4433 (I tried just regular 43, but that was taken too – geez, how many people are on Match.com anyway???)

So let’s talk about some of the guys’ screen names now…  I got an email and a wink from Nicedaddy4you who described me as a “pack of beauty.” Wow, I don’t think I’ve ever been described as a pack of anything before, so that’s a first.  I politely declined…   Then I saw TrainedMonkey25 – wasn’t sure what to even think about this one, but he was kinda cute and had a nice profile – I winked at him, he winked back and I sent a quick email.  Other funny names were Happycar, Divenaked, Prince Shrek, etc. etc. etc.

Match also gives you the opportunity to describe what your date should look like – height, body type, hair color, etc. These are all multiple choice questions, but when a guy says that his date should be between 3’0” and 8’11”, I’m pretty sure there wasn’t a lot of thought put into it.  Here’s a tip for those guys – get off Match.com and try the circus.

In all this craziness, I have to report that I have some conversations going with a few guys.  Here is the selection I have going right now (in no particular order).  Feel free to weigh in and let me know your favorite!

·         UPS driver, 45:  We exchanged our pre-selected questions and then had a few days lapse before he sent me a message saying it was his last day on eHarmony and gave me his email and phone number.  I sent him an email but haven’t heard back yet.  It doesn’t look like he has kids, but he has a dog.  It also sounds like he had someone cheat on him based on some of the wording in his profile and how he answered some of his questions.

·         Educator, 47:  We went through all of our pre-selected questions and the next step is if he wants to send me a regular message through the system.  He seems like a very nice guy but I can’t tell how his sense of humor is – I do like a guy who can make me laugh and smile and he strikes me as a bit more reserved.  He has a son.

·         Small business owner, 42:  We’ve made it all the way through the pre-selected stuff and have been messaging back and forth several times.  He’s looking for a strong loving relationship (in fact, he admires that his sister has the type of relationship that he never had).  I can’t tell if he’s a little shy or if he’s a bit insecure based on bad experiences in the past.  He has children (not sure how many – I only see one in the pictures), but he sounds like a good dad.

·         Radio guy, 50: This was my first “hit” on Match.  He reached out to me and we had a nice IM chat session back and forth for the better part of an hour.  He seems like a nice guy and we do share some similarities.  We’re emailing back and forth through Match to get to know each other better.  He’s never been married and I can see a bit of insecurity coming through, although he is asking good questions like “what’s the main thing that men don’t get about women?” My answer, BTW, was that men underestimate the power of being a gentlemen (opening doors and flowers for no reason). J

·         Chef, 47: This one just started this morning… he sent me the first round of pre-selected questions and I sent mine back to him.  This one gets bonus points for having an Australian accent (OMG!)

So that’s what has been keeping me busy over the last week or so.  Five solid options to choose from – now I’m just waiting for some first dates so I can see if they live up to their profiles. I’m ready to dust off those heels so these guys can see what they’re in for… Let’s see if the secret weapons can help me find someone who appreciates (and loves) me for the “pack of beauty” that I truly am. ;)

“New and Exciting”

Besides working this week, I have been surfing eHarmony to see what new and exciting potentials are on there (and by “new and exciting,” I also mean the matches that have been on there all along). 

I extended my options a bit with the site which just means that eHarmony will take the liberty a bit more with who it sends me. You can choose things like the distance that you would like your matches in, and then you pick how important this is to you.  I moved my choice down the scale a bit, more towards “moderately important,” which means I’m getting matches that are a little further away from me.  I’m keeping an open mind and looking at everything, including the distance.  Like I’ve said before, if the match is good and there’s potential in the relationship, then a little distance is OK. 

I have received “new and exciting” matches over the past few days and I’ve send a few icebreakers out.  I’ve even looked at some of the existing matches (which are “new and exciting” when you haven’t looked at them for a while), and I sent some icebreakers to them as well.  I’m sure they’re thinking one of two things about me:

1.        Wow, she’s a nice match and I’m glad she’s finally interested in me.

2.       Wow, she must have gone through all of her first, second and third choices already and she’s trolling the matches that are left in a desperate attempt to find a date.

Yeah, I’m sure I would be thinking #2 also if the situation was reversed.

Anyway, all of those “new and exciting” potentials turned up a whole lot of nothing (zip, zero, nada).  Only two of them “archived” me right away (which is a nice way of saying deleted).  Whatever!  But, I’m happy to report that a new match that popped up this afternoon sent me an icebreaker!  He’s 45, cute and has a nice profile… he appears to have a convertible (as per one of his pictures) and he has a dog (dog people are good people in my book).  I responded by giving him some the standard questions to answer, so we’ll see what happens next.  I can honestly say that this is the first guy that’s sent an icebreaker to me that isn’t too old, too hairy (ewww), or just too blah. 

It’s a good thing because I’ve got some great shoes that are just dying to be worn! ;)

Closing the book

The e-Harmony match with M-Daddy has been officially archived and now officially closed.

Ok, allow me to back up… So, we had a very nice (and somewhat involved) date, but apparently he didn’t like the fact that we were an hour away from each other.  Sure, he made a comment about the drive when he got here, but based on what transpired during the date, I was pretty sure he didn’t mind.  After all, we managed to make it work just fine when we were 3000 miles away from each other, surely we could make being one hour away from each other work.

My feelings on the matter:

·         I like him and saw good potential in the relationship.  An hour isn’t that bad and you find ways to make it work.

His feelings on the matter:

·         He liked me, we had fun together and he saw the same potential that I did, but an hour is just too long of a drive.

So that’s it.  After trying to make it work, I’m now officially done with M-Daddy.

Since it’s over, which he made very apparent after he uploaded a new picture on e-Harmony a matter of hours after our date (I noticed that this morning), I got busy reviewing my other potential matches.  I’m back to starting from square one, so I sent out some “smile” icebreakers to see what happens. 

I’ve been in the dating pool for almost three months (which come to think of it, my e-Harmony renewal will be coming up soon, ugh!), and so far the only thing I have to show for it was a very long text thread which has now been deleted.   Here’s to the next three months!

What’s Cookin’?

Deciding what to do on date #3 wasn’t an easy chore.  M-Daddy and I had talked about a “spicy challenge” for a while, so we started to stake out where this throw down could take place.  He didn’t want me to have to drive too far, so I started to scope out restaurants about halfway between our towns.  I turned to Yelp and Urban Spoon, which have always worked out well in the past, but not this time.  The issue wasn’t the number of restaurants or the ratings they received – it was the number of actual reviews that the restaurants had. Sure, a restaurant that has 4 ½ stars looks promising… until you see that there are a whopping 4 reviews.  Let’s see... #1 is probably the owner, #2 is probably the owner’s husband/wife and #3 and #4 are probably friends/relatives of the owner. 

So, after discussing the not-so-hopeful choices on Yelp and Urban Spoon, M-Daddy brought up the fact that I did have a selection of spices at my disposal – maybe he could cook for me.  So we made plans for a nice, casual Saturday date at my house. 

Of course, that first meant that I needed to (somewhat) finish unpacking so there were dishes/pot/pans/table/chairs available for this anticipated meal.  My furniture finally came on Tuesday evening, so I spent most of Wednesday and Thursday unpacking what seemed like an endless pile of boxes. 

I’m happy to report that almost all of my furniture safely made the trip.  The two pieces that sadly didn’t survive were the two armchairs to my dining room set (which, ironically, were the two chairs that I never really liked in the first place - DBE picked those out, not me). My headboard survived, but has a nice chunk taken out of the top, left corner.  My claim has already been filed…  Luckily, the pieces that I was worried about, like a large, glass front china cabinet and a 5’ tall resin Pepe Le Pew (yes, I am a animation art fan) arrived perfectly.  My mom came over to help me unpack and I’m happy to report that pretty much everything except the second bedroom and a little bit of the office was all that was left to do.  It was nice to be able to bring my “hot date” over to a somewhat finished house. ;)

On Saturday morning, I checked out the selection in the fridge – I had some basic veggies and beef on hand and I took a trip to a farmer’s market in the morning for whatever else looked good.  BTW, I must be really spoiled by the SF farmer’s markets because this one was not that impressive.  I found a few things, but nothing to supplement the potential meal.

The city I live in is a network of canals, so I’m glad that M-Daddy had GPS to find the place.  Turns out we’re an hour from each other, but that’s better than being 3000 miles away like we were before. We ended up spending a nice afternoon together, and the answer to the question is yes, he is as good of a cook as he said he was. :)  He perused through the available spices like a pro as he figured out what to make.  We ended up with beef stir fry with veggies and potatoes over rice noodles. He used three different spices in his concoction and it was very yummy.  I opened a nice shiraz and we had some great conversation over a great (and spicy) meal.

Date #3 has come and gone, and now we move forward.  This is already turning out to be a relationship with a little spice, which is always a good thing (*wink*).  Apparently, both of us can handle the heat…